Meshed Up Mess

Isn’t it funny how we can become overwhelmed from taking on too much so we take on less, but still end up not getting anything done because we still feel overwhelmed?

That’s been the past few weeks but time to get back to my usual routine.

With my photographer friend, Sammy from Sammy L. Photography, the two of us embarked around the Museum of Glass for the photo shoot featuring this mesh tank!

I know it’s slowly becoming fall, but I love mesh tops to death. Mesh anything really. For some reason, the aesthetics of purposely placed holes in clothing pleases me. Ripped jeans, starry lace?

It’s just so exhilarating and makes the outfit itself feel super fun while looking sharp, The holes in the mesh add a really nice fun and flirty element to everything, so after I saw it at Kohl’s I kind of just said good bye to my wallet and picked it up instead. Luckily, it wasn’t that expensive.

Or maybe it was.

After these past two weeks of being almost constantly $50 overdrawn, I’ve learned that I really have no concept of money.  However, it becomes kind of surreal to me.

Do I really have no concept of money, or do I just act like I don’t because I want to escape a reality of where everything that lay in my hands felt like too much… by being irresponsible?

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Lots of people become a mess because we end up trying to distract ourselves from the things that we don’t want to think about. Anything and everything to make it all the more convenient for us. Although it’s beneficial, we often times don’t face ourselves because those moments of clarity can be what hurt the most.

Then after we realize what the problem is, what do we do about it?

Even if we know what to do, why is it so hard to put it into action?

And in the end, is what we know… reality?

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I’ve found the answer to the last question to be yes, however, because reality is what we feel that we know it can also be inaccurate.  We all live in the same world yet how we each perceive what’s around us can be so different. Our emotions, thoughts and even the conclusions we come to end up being so varied. The thing is, not only is it different compared to other people but it can also be different compared to ourselves.

We’ve all procrastinated at some point in time, but even when it’s the smallest task, it just feels like whatever has to get done is such a hassle. It can’t be bothered. Yet, when we actually begin to work on it, the actual process itself doesn’t feel as bad as we make it out to. Thinking of each step, on the other hand, is extremely tiring.

Getting out of bed just seems like an awful idea some days.

You need to leave the warmth of the blankets, comfort of your mattress, and.. walk? 

Really, it’s not that bad. You know that. I know that. But when you think of each and every step in the process that has to be overcome, it just gets overwhelming even though you have the capability of doing it.

In the end, we not only over estimate ourselves when we take on too much, but we also over-estimate simple scenarios. Maybe the reason why we take so long to take action, is because over-estimating what could happen takes so much less effort, than experiencing the results ourselves.

What ever the reason may be, keep your head held high even when you’re dying inside.

I’ll keep you company.

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Photography by Sammy L. Photography

Shirt: Juniors’ Candie’s® Open-Work Star Lace Tank (Kohls)
Heels: Women’s Indi Peep Toe Bootie Heel (Payless)

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